Belleville Family Law Blog

Divorce will impact your life in many ways. While it's easy to focus on the personal changes that you're going through, your finances require just as much attention.

Here are several things you can do to protect your finances during divorce:

• Open separate bank accounts: Gone are the days of sharing a bank account with your spouse. Now, it's important to have your own accounts, as you don't want to co-mingle your money. The second you decide to divorce is the second you should open your own bank accounts.
• Close joint credit cards: If you neglect to do this, your soon-to-be ex-spouse could run up a large balance, putting you on the hook for some of the debt. Closing the account takes this risk out of the equation.
• Review your credit report: This will give you a clear idea of where things stand in regard to your finances, which is important when it comes to opening a new credit card account, renting an apartment or buying a vehicle.
• Keep copies of important financial documents: This can include but is not limited to bank account statements, retirement account statements, life insurance policies and tax returns. You'll need these documents during the divorce process. They may also come in handy in the future.

Once your divorce is final, you should turn all your attention to creating a better life for you and your children in the future. While it's not always easy to co-parent, dedicating yourself to doing the right thing will ease your stress.

Unfortunately, it's easy to make mistakes with your children after divorce, with these among the most common:

• Force your children to take sides: Don't ask your children who they like better. Don't prompt your children to tell your ex that they'd rather spend time with you. Putting your children in the middle will increase tension for all parties involved.
• Assuming you'll never have to see your ex again: This may be possible if you don't have children together, but when co-parenting you'll have to communicate and see your ex from time to time. Showing your children that you're able to get along is healthy for everyone.
• Attempting to keep them away from your ex's family: It's okay to do this if you have a good reason, but don't get in the way out of spite. For example, it's important for your children to spend time with your ex's parents.

Even if you are on speaking terms with your soon-to-be-ex-spouse, that doesn't necessarily mean you should communicate during the divorce process. Sure, there are times when this is necessary, such as during mediation. However, you should be careful about what you say at other times.

Here are some things to consider:

• Anything you say can complicate your situation: For example, if you share too much information on how you're approaching the divorce, your spouse may be able to use it to their advantage.
• Stay off of social media: It doesn't matter if you're talking in a friendly tone or not, stay off of social media for the time being. Your activity on social media can complicate the divorce process.
• Communicate for the well-being of your children: If you have children together, you'll probably need to talk during the divorce process. It's okay to do so, just make sure you take steps to avoid trouble. With tensions high, any disagreement has the potential to turn into a serious argument.

While you never want to admit that you've spotted one or more warning signs of divorce, this may be the reality you're living. This should lead you to consider the finer details of your relationship, with an eye toward taking the right next step.

There are many warning signs of divorce, with these three among the most common:

• You're unhappy: In simple terms, you're no longer happy with the life you're living. Maybe you argue with your spouse all the time. Or maybe you find it difficult to enjoy the things that once made you happy.
• You avoid your spouse: There are many signs that you're doing this, such as staying late at work so you don't have to spend as much time at home. You may even get the feeling that you'd rather drive around in your car than go home to face your spouse.
• Your family and friends have doubts: If others can see trouble with your marriage, there's a good chance something is going on. Get honest with yourself as you evaluate the good and bad associated with your marriage. Furthermore, don't get upset with loved ones for trying to help.